Grandaddy's Hand

It wasn't the icicles melting on the sidewalk,

Or the string of lights that decorated the block.

It wasn't the smell of the fresh cut pine,

Or the gifts perfectly wrapped and decorated with twine.

It wasn't the mistletoe hanging in the doorway,

Or 'In Excelsis Gloria' that would ring in the entryway.

It wasn't the golden turkey or the lemon meringue pie.

It wasn't even the sweet, candied pecans we just had to try.

When I heard Grandmother say, "Dinner is to start,"

Brought a memory I will forever cherish within my heart.

One day a year, she would pretend to not see me

Running through the house as fast as could be.

The first one to the table, hoping I didn't get caught,

And claiming the seat next to Grandaddy, because that is the best spot.

You could see the excitement on my face,

When he would grab my hand and say, "Let us bow our heads and say Grace."

He would hold my hand tight as he thanked God above,

For the food we were about to eat and for His everlasting love.

But the moment I looked forward to the most was when,

He would gently squeeze my hand after saying Amen.

Love & Miss you Grandaddy

Destination Unknown

Morning sun reflecting off the wings of an airplane

That is slowly pulling away from that little black lane;

Leaving this cruel world for the peace of the open sky.

It climbs higher and higher, never looking back, and not saying good-bye.

Away it flies until it you can no longer see.

Lost in the moment, I wish that on that plane was me.

Where is it going? I do not know.

The pilot says Destination Unknown.

A journey to a far away place so grand?

Or maybe this plane will never land.

Soar with the birds, be a neighbor to the sun

A new life amongst the clouds will have begun.

Tip toeing on the moon or dancing on a star

Don't you worry about me, I won't be too far.

Be still and hear my voice in the wind,

And with each breeze - feel the brush of my skin.

Keep that smile on your face - don't ever get blue,

Because on the wing of the plane I sit watching over you.

Last

Flaming coals my bare feet have touched

To prove to you my love is much.

A bed of nails is where I sleep

To prove to you my love runs deep.

Swim to the ends of the ocean blue

To prove to you my love is true.

I give my all, I do my best,

But with you there is always one more test.

I've come to realize I will never pass

Because in your eyes, I will always come up last.

Blacktop Daydream

Traveling down the empty road, hypnotized by the yellow line

A million and one thoughts are running through my mind.

Emptyness before me and in my rear view

Only visions of memories as if they were new.

This neverending asphalt is torture to my soul.

Each mile that passes I wonder why you had to go.

Silence surrounds me, it's only my thoughts I hear

For a moment I almost see you appear,

Sitting next to me in the passenger seat singing along with the radio

Tapping your hand to the beat of Sheryl Crow.

Through my tears I sing along

Knowing this moment won't last too long.

This blacktop daydream will come to an end

And back to Heaven you will ascend.

My heart will never be the same,

And only memories will remain.

Graduation Day

Watching as the little girl who once was takes her place on the stage

Like so many other parents, I ask myself, how did you get to this age?

Visions of a stringy pony tail, mismatched clothes, and silliness

Are replaced by the reality of a young woman with poise and elegance.

Time has once again proven that it continues to pass

It does not pause, there’s no stopping it no matter how much we ask.

And now here it is, the moment for you to spread your wings

Step out into the world and fulfill your dreams.

I pray that I have given you everything you need

To move on to the next chapter of your life and succeed.

And with those prayers there will be some tears

Mixed with the smiles, I love you, and cheers.

While I am so proud of the young lady you have grown to be

Watching as you graduate is a little difficult for me.

So if I give you a hug and hold on a little longer than I normally do

Just know that I am remembering each moment of raising you.

And if I can’t speak and get a little choked up

Remember it isn’t easy watching my little girl turn into a grownup.

As you proudly accept your diploma on graduation day

And walk out of Walnut Springs High School to make your way

Remember the world is yours make your dreams come true,

But most of all, Remember I love you.

Wings to Fly Home

I went to visit you the other day

Even though it is just a grave.

I talked to you until the sun went away,

And the skies of blue began turning gray.

My thoughts, my words traveled above

Carried to Heaven on the wings of a dove.

Even though your home is in another place,

Every corner, every road I see your face.

It's been a little while, but still seems untrue.

I often wonder what am I to do?

In my mind you were never going to leave,

But you did, and I still don't want to believe.

That the strongest woman I have ever known,

Was given wings to fly on home.

White Flag

Harsh words come at me like daggers in the night,

Breaking my spirit until I cannot begin to fight.

I surrender.

Into the Waves

There is a place I would like to go

Just leave this town and let nobody know.

The sun on my back and the road before me

Guiding my path to the endless sea.

You'll look around and see I'm not there

And think to yourself I should have showed her more that I care.

Please, Stop! Don't go, you say

But by that time I will be well on my way.

Traveling to where the water meets the shore

I will continue walking until I can't walk no more.

Into the waves you'll see me disappear.

There you'll stand with your deepest fear.

Your cries will be just echos carried by the wind

And there you will be with a heart in need of mend.

Release Me

In the dead silence I hear my heart pound

And feel its hard thump with each step that hits the ground.

The weight I carry has my knees buckling beneath me

But I must continue to move forward in order to be free.

I want to leave the sadness and hurt far behind

It is peace and happiness that I desire to find.

How long must I travel?  How far must I go?

My soul is tired of searching for a better tomorrow.

One foot in front of the other, chin up, is the way I live

But I cannot find it within me to continue to give.

The ground beneath me is beginning to shake

I feel myself stumbling there’s not much more I can take.

Hold it together. You can’t be that way.

That’s the only thing I hear anyone say.

Who is the person I have become?

This is not me, I am not that one.

The break must come, Relief must arrive.

Because continuing on like this, I won’t survive.

I am reaching for help as I am being crushed.

Deeper into the dark I am being pushed.

Longing, Searching, Begging for peace.

Yearning for my soul to be released.